absolute

stripped birch trees still standing

autumns laughing but i won't be

when they're peeled away of their

body, used carelessly

no one wants to be in the hands of someone else

unless they trust them but those are fools

inevitably so am i

maple trees offer sap like bed time stories

fed into our laps when we would question why

all of the time

finding out nothing more than to be quiet

the best lesson in the world i'm sure

come day break, dawn falls short

of our expectations & fairy tale endings

you work to get by

until the people you say goodbye to disappear

another year

another dollar

you could take a trip

to be someone else

besides yourself

asking why

scenery changes but you're still the same
mom used to say there was promise

& dad used to say there was another day

she broke hers

he didn't find his own

clouds are infinite sparking our imagination

we depict faces, shapes while we laugh

laying on the grass until someone doesn't agree

revoked our right of individuality

when someone shows us their own

bought & grown

from the highest billboards

selling the cheapest shit

i can't afford

thank the good Lord for loans

if he ever gave you some credit

at least there's debit

to show you your value in numbers

like over draft

we depict faces, shapes while we laugh

the temperature is warm

i want absolute zero

nothing to count

no room to grow

to feel any less

no one wants to be in the hands of someone else

hopeful street art

you oughta know

the sensation of brutality

to have some edge

how to bring your soul to life

after it's dead

find freedom in a penitentiary

seek kindness from a stranger

know your limits

withhold your anger

find love not gimmicks

& fear no danger

you oughta believe

that you're unstoppable

to get somewhere

how to be a catalyst

when you prefer to be staid

find forgiveness in an enemy

seek comfort from the unknown

know your triggers

withstand your choices

find value not figures

& hear all voices

you oughta accept

that luck ain't always on your side

it may never be

how to focus your energy

when it's lacking

find power when you're not in control

seek faith when you're not too sure

know your rights

without feeling jipped

find solutions not fights

& always be equipped

to start all over

again

& again

old news

recycled pieces of what's left

numbered stages of grief

when the novelty wears off

i'm more alone than i've ever been

i can't feed myself

my credit is shaken

as the power goes out

accepting loss

while going without

isn't front page news

neither are

obituaries & monasteries

the reality of my life

suffering in silence

barely touching the surface

with whimpers & forceful laughs

borderline relapse

if i could

if i could i would

this isn't your life

so you don't deserve this

monologue of despair

you don't owe me anything

i can't expect you to understand

i won't beg & plead

scream in tears

i have none of what i need

to live & recover

the loss of a friend

a mother

my family & my dreams

this roof is temporary

i can't pay the lease of life

as i hand out what's left

to this bed

the thought of rest is nice

though not in reach. . .

let me be

obsolete in eternity

instead of hell

i'm not well

i'm not well

i'm not well

no one is too small

i'm going to be okay because i can remember

i was created out of love

i was taught out of hope

& i know that people are inherently good

& i know that people are not their bodies

i retain faith in the universe unfolding as it should

i believe i have a purpose in this world

we are here to improve

we are here to change

we are here to create

we are here to let go

we are here to love

we are here to be someone all on our own

& one day i hope to embrace her again

& one day i hope to hear him sing to me again

but i will embrace my children & sing to them

i will teach them everything i was taught

& show them that love exists beyond death

as mine will never waiver

it won't falter

it's true because i continue

i know that's what they want me to do

i'll let them know that's what i want them to do

i'll be waiting because i know i'm waited for

i will live my life graciously

i will live my life unapologetically

so they can too

& people will follow suit

no one will die in vain

this comforter doesn't comfort me

i woke up at 4 in the afternoon

my eyes aren't closing

my body isn't resting

i fell asleep at 11 this morning

i tried to find you

instead of your ghost

if i asked him to, he'd spend the night

wide awake staring at the ceiling, i won't let go

of someone else

desperate to find some familiarity in the past

lovers & friends

who left & found their way back

only to leave again

i'm leaving too, except

i don't want to but i can't stay

restless, sleepless

& colourless in my dreams

that are taunting me, threatening

i'm nothing more than a ransom note

scribbled away as a promise of good things to come

a write-off to her happiness

i wonder if it's worth the struggle of negotiation

to find it doesn't exist

or create mine

plain & simple, the sun lost its heat in this heat wave

i can't feel a thing

sunstroke, silence, satire

3 things life after you brings

there's no exchange policy,

refunded denial of our mortality

let that be a lesson in longing

lessen the loss

what passes, came

you get what you give

take my faith, have my hope

both have seen better days

& make a mockery of yourself

i'd rather be a fool

than fool a soul by saying we have one

the wilk experiment

This is my page you can’t call it your own. It can’t leave me because it relies on me to write for centuries that have left behind billions of obituaries and it can go to hell. I start again and build what communists destroy, I liberate what imprisons me by continuing to go ford despite the shallow depths and unbelievable lengths I suffer to discover that’s exactly what they are. Time is instantaneous but a lie just the same. I don’t believe it ever passes or continues it’s infinite and isolated never moving an inch. It’s our minds that believe we can calculate what is not ours to bait and entrap in photographs with captions underneath that fail to realize it wasn’t the day that changed only the circumstances. I feel obligated to succeed by being productive but all that breeds are distractions. The only success in life is mastering you and finding joy in nothing at all. I haven’t reached the half mark yet but I continue to go forth not begrudgingly of course – there is always something to contemplate and let be known. The humor I find most enthralling is the kind that depicts tragedy it’s the only way we cope, guilt be damned as no good ends on that note. I can relate to whatever you throw my way because I’m empathetic and extremely self-reflective a sword which hasn’t cut me so far but I have a long way to go. I love how we don’t know and hate it as well. The cliché about life and writing is the fact they're both oxymoron’s that label everything a contradiction. I see in grey, I hate those blacks and whites. The only final is death, the utmost absolute truth everything else is our perspective which is skewed and renewed depending on our mood. Your confidence is a lie to help you through knowing the world is out of your control and there is no one that can help you understand your role even if you think you do. I don’t like dogs because they jump on top of me and they drool which is unfair because when I sleep it’s a sore sight to see but that’s the way it is because it can be. We can do, make and believe whatever we want so if you’re miserable you should try something else. I am alive though I’ve been surrounded by death and that makes the world a beautiful place in some twisted kind of way. You learn to love and let go. You are blessed to remember and console. Imagine if we had no one to miss and no reason to be missed? A sad state of affairs I would imagine not that those are good but sometimes people need to shake things up a bit. Nothing escapes change or ending so perhaps extra-marital affairs are a good thing. Oh, blessed be the silver lining the carries me on a cloud that I haven’t fallen through so I know I’ll never fall just float and rise, rid myself of disguise and accept the world for what it is: chaotic and mysterious. I thought I was finished but there’s still room left on Mircosoft word when I change the size of the font.. It kinda pissed me off ‘cause I thought I had finally accomplished a challenge of sorts but now you see how I’m feeling more than you would have if I stopped right there. So if you’re stuck keep going ‘cause there is always somewhere with room for you and there is always something left for you.